言語/Language/语言

Japanese men’s image and reality

samurai 2258604 1920 - Japanese men's image and reality

What kind of image do you have about Japanese men?

The following bad images might me common.

 

  • Bossy
  • Subjection of women
  • Force the marriage partner to become a full-time housewife
  • Don’t do housework

 

These are all the characteristics of Japanese men decades ago!

Especially in urban areas, these male figures are completely a thing of the past.

(4) “Do not do housework” may be a little true, but there are reasonable reasons.

I will explain in detail.

 

Bossy

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Perhaps the generation whose husband was bossy is over 80 or 90 years old.

For couples around 60 years old, I don’t think there are many bossy men.

No need to say, even younger generation’s men are not bossy.

 

Women have been basically strong in Japanese culture.

While social status of men is certainly higher, there are many cases where women are stronger in domestic status.

 

The opposite of bossy husband is “Kakaa Tenka” which means henpecked husband.

In my parents’ generation around 60 years old, there are many “Kakaa Tenka” families.

 

Most of the powers in Japan are men, so it seems surprising.

(In fact, I often hear that men in high position are henpecked husband in their relationship.)

 

Younger couples (20s and 30s) are mostly women-first!

Around me, almost all women’s opinions related to life like “wedding hall”, “house to live”, and “furniture” are preferred.

 

Subjection of women

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In the past, there was the idea that “a man succeeds the family”.

The subjection of women is based on this idea.

 

However, there is almost no such idea now.

Especially in urban areas, “nuclearization of family” has progressed, and both boys and girls who are born are equally blessed.

 

However, in some parts of the countryside, it seems that the concept of subjection of women is still remaining.

I’m from the capital city: Tokyo, so I was really surprised to hear that there are still areas where this way of thinking lives.

That’s why this culture is an old old culture.

 

Force the marriage partner to become a full-time housewife

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Occasionally, some foreigners say, “Does a Japanese man force his marriage partner to become a full-time housewife? I don’t like it…”

This is exactly the opposite!

 

It seems that there was such a trend several decades ago.

Many of our mothers were full-time housewives and many of their fathers were working hard.

 

What happened to such a father?

  • They are lonely after retirement, because they didn’t communicate with their family.
  • Death from overwork
  • Since they had been only worked, they have nothing to do after retirement and became a cave

 

The men who have seen such fathers think that;

  • I don’t want to live my life like a father!
  • I want to have time with my family and hobbies
  • It is too hard to support economically the whole family alone.
  • I want my wife to bear the financial burden (instead of doing childcare and housework)

 

On the other hand, the number of women want to become full-time housewives is increasing .

However, women who can become full-time housewives are limited to “persons who can get married to men who are high-income and allow them to become full-time housewives”, so full-time housewives are regarded as winning groups.

 

If you want to work after marriage, you are almost certainly welcomed by men!

Rather, many men are tired of full-time housewives, so showing your willingness to work after marriage is an big advantage when looking for a partner!

 

Don’t do housework

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Recent men are willing to do housework.

Still, there are several reasons why women spend much more time on housework than men:

 

Going home late (long working hours)

culturally, male working hours are generally longer than female working hours.

Even when overtime occurs, there are many workplaces where men are forced to do it.

And most Japanese managers are still men.

Male bosses are more likely to ask male subordinates (it is easier to force) rather than women, so the amount of work for men inevitably increases.

This is irresistible force, so I want you to understand.

 

There are still many family whose wives are full-time housewives.

This is not necessary to explain.

 

Women are particular about the details

There are a lot of Japanese women who are particular about details.

There are many cases in which a man is at a level that is not a problem, but woman is not satisfied with it and starts doing housework.

For example, “how to dry laundry” and “how to wash dishes”, and so on…

 

If you don’t care about the details, and if you flatter your partner into doing housework, you can get comfortable life^^

 

I hope that there will be no misunderstandings about Japanese men!

 

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