Photo
1
I have been longing to have a photo
Since I saw the billboards put up by
The grammarians of the studios that
Life is momentary
And photo is permanent
We do not know what is going to happen
And I love me so much...
I just wanted to catch it alive
The adolescent smile under the budding moustache
The future hope in the eyes of youth
A mirror only shows our face as it is
I wanted to see the face that ought to be
In a photograph
2
Police started valuing my photo
Since I made friends with students,
Started moving in the company of youth,
And began loving people
I never heard that the photos of the fearless
Replace those of the criminals
When pictures that
Kith and kin and friends and lovers
Preserve as a cherished sweet passion
Are wanted by police
The jolly mood to give a pose
Gets spoiled
3
Where smiles shower as moonlight
They offered urine for thirst
Seared blossoming youth with cigarette buts
It is not a photo but
Blazing blood that they hung
On the walls of the lock-up
They develop sun in the dark room
Attempting to find out the origin of light
4
They plucked my moustache in the lock-up
Remove that photo
They poured acid in my eyes
Remove that photo
They search for me with
My live photograph in hands
Hide me in the heart
Put that photo on to the burning lamp
In the dark room
The photo that you touch gently
The photo that you look at secretly near the lamp
In the vicinity of past recollections
The smell of the burning photo
Is in fact the stench of
Iron heels and brutal feet
The stink of khaki dress
5
I lost all my desire for a photo
It is true, photo lasts long
But I lost hope in being static
I want to flow
Living, moving, changing
As a symbol of dying change
Doesn't any remembrance linger?
See in the lamp
Doesn't any symbol remain?
Look in the wisdom
Fix your eyes on to your mind
And see the movement that creates
Stir in the waters
6
This is a system
Where taste is a weakness
Friendship a spy that attacks
Love apprehends risk
People's knowledge is treated as
Something that can be ignited
This is a society where
Values are upside down
Here
Destroy even the negatives
In the studio
***
(Police had lathi-charged us to take our photographs forcibly in Goshamahal police lockup when we were arrested in front of the State Assembly, Hyderabad on July 4, 1984)
August 3, 1984
Translated by N. Venugopal